6 Reasons I Love Batgirl

I've only been reading Bat comics since Dick took over and Bruce got dead lost in time. And, as I've learned, it's near impossible to jump into a series and have any idea what's going on. Aside from some of the old Birds of Prey, most of my limited knowledge of Gotham backstory comes from Wiki or other randomness I've read on the Internet. This weekend I was stuck at home thanks to an epic snowstorm, and I finally got around to reading War Games, which I been warned was horrible. But, I still thought I should read it for backstory's sake. If you're unfamiliar with War Games, it was a DC crossover storyline wherein Steph accidentally started a huge gang war in Gotham and was killed. Given how awfully this storyline treated Steph, and how much I've loved her in the new Batgirl book, I felt like I list some reasons Steph is completely kick-ass as the new Batgirl.

I'm not entirely sure how she came to be among the living again, but it's a comic, so it's only a matter of time until dead characters are resurrected. Anyway, she ended up on the mortal plane again, and we're so much better off for it.

1. Her inner monologue uses capslock when the sitution is socially awkward enough to call for it. And she's such a socially awkward penguin that you can't help but love her.


2. Unlike the vast majority of the Bat-family, Steph does not feel the need to be a complete jackass. Compare Dick's reaction to meeting Detective St. Nick to the message Steph leaves him after their first encounter:




3. Steph's the only person who can make Damien bearable. Sometimes that means freezing him in a block of ice, but in the most recent issue, we saw them actually make a pretty good team when Dick tried to sideline them.



4. Oracle is her mentor, which means there's lots and lots of grumpy Oracle. Grumpy Oracle is the best thing ever. Seriously, I wish Babs was my curmudgeony aunt.



And with Birds of Prey returning as an ongoing series, there will be even more Babs!

5. Batgirl is full of Buffy-style humor, and pulls it off way better than the current ongoing Buffy series. And with the comparative serious business of Dollhouse, my life has sorely been lacking in this department.



6. Steph avoids being another broody member of the Bat-family, even though she has ample reason for being Ms. Doom-and-Gloom. She was brutally murdered by Black Mask, for starters. Everyone except Babs thinks she's going to get herself killed again, and Babs only changed her mind recently. Despite all of this, Steph manages to crack jokes and make bad puns when she's getting her butt kicked.



And although she's no longer Robin, Steph is filling the usual Robin role of being a source of light for Gotham. Batman works through fear and intimidation, and while Dick is considerably less moody than Bruce, he's followed Bruce's Batman scary persona. And Damien isn't exactly a little bundle of joy as Robin. Babs described him as "a murderous little twit." Steph, on the other hand, has a different understanding of how superheroing should work:

And that's why you all should be reading Batgirl.

Avatar Review - Spoilers

Guess which movie I saw today?

Early concept art for Avatar

I'll be the first to admit that I went into Avatar with the full intention of loathing it. When my mom said she wanted to go see it, I turned into a ball of snarl and rage, but she had the final say in movie pick since she was paying. So I figured I'd at least try to make snarky lemonade out of it.

Going in the theater, I expected to fall in love with the visual effects and hate the story, but I also kind of feared actually liking the movie and having to deal with more self-loathing than from seeing Twilight. Twice. Fortunately, I don't have to berate myself mentally for the next few days. And the only thing I liked about the visual effects were the N'avi themselves. Whatever face-capture thingie James Cameron used was pretty badass; seeing catsmurf!Sigourney Weaver for the first time was the high point of the movie for me. However, while the Pandoran flora and fauna were very pretty, I don't think their animation was game-changingly beautiful/realistic. Although, as a life-long Nintendo fan, I've convinced myself that kickass graphics are a unnecessary luxury, so your mileage may vary.

While we're still discussing the visuals, I'll slip in a quick little rant here: I appreciate the fact that you didn't give your female aliens giant blue bazookas, James Cameron, but I still saw a lot of catsmurf!Zoe's underboob cleavage. Damn closet furry director.

And now to the story itself. Basically, it's Pocahontas, except Kocoum survives, or Fern Gully, but with less subtlety. That's right, James Cameron spent ten years and enough money to buy a small country on a movie less subtle than FERN GULLY, whose villain was A GODDAMN SKELETON MADE OUT OF OIL THAT KILLED SMALL WOODLAND CREATURES FOR FUN.

Wait, is this supposed to be a metaphor for something?

So the evil imperial humans have come to the beautiful, pristine world of Pandora in order to mine it for Unobtainium.

Stop. Read that last word out loud. UN-OBTAIN-IUM. Pronounced exactly like that. *facepalm*

Get it? Because the humans can't obtain unobtainium because it's all under Grandmother Willow the Mother Tree. And the goddamn hippy catsmurfs won't leave their goddamn tree so Mr. Corporate Executive who practices his golf with a coffee cup in his office can meet his quota of unobtainium and make the shareholders happy. So he's brought in General Scarface to blow the shit out of everything.

When we first see Pandora, General Scarface explains that IT IS THE MOST FUCKING DANGEROUS PLACE EVER AND THOSE TEAL-AND-PURPLE FLOWER RHINOS WILL KICK YOUR PUSSY ASS. Yes, they expect us to believe that the humans with all their missiles, robot fighting suits, machine guns, and helicopters are in mortal danger from what the catsmurfs handle with bows and arrows.

But of course, the catsmurfs can handle Pandora because they are the NOBLE SAVAGES. And no, that's not racist because they're blue so they're not connected to any actually ethnic groups. But being noble savages, they are pure but inferior so they need a white man to lead them, and oh! look at that - Jake Sulley, ex-Marine, has learned the catsmurf ways. In less than three months, he's learned a couple of handy phrases in catsmurfish, mindraped a dragon with his ponytail, and had sexytimes with Princess Zoe under Grandmother Willow, so the N'avi accept him as one of their own. And since Jake Sulley is white he has a brilliant idea that none of the stupid catsmurfs could come up with: Let's resist the humans when they try to blow us up. And although the silly catsmurfs have dreadlocks and Ethiopian accents and Native American-like dress, it obviously isn't racist because they're blue and not brown. *headdesk*

Also, since the catsmurfs are so very in touch with nature, their spiritual leader must be female. Because the wimmins are all earthy and can talk to trees and shit. *headdesk* *headdesk* *headdesk*

Anyways, General Scarface leads the humans to bomb the shit out of the catsmurfs, but oh snap! Grandmother Willow sends out the teal-and-purple flower rhinos and together with the catsmurfs and their dragons they drive off the evil humans. Hurray! The last rainforest is safe again!